Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Another Government Saving Program

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas Road Construction Season. I can feel it in the air. The birds are chirping, the flowers are blooming, and the orange barrels are stacking along the side of the road. I contemplated the implications of this upcoming season in my run today.

I anticipate the benefits that will come from this season's construction. The Interstate will be one year closer to a smoother ride thus allowing me to pass all the idiots drivers on my the road. More importantly I have come up with a plan to speed things along.

The Problem: Economic downturn is the new buzz word in business this year. This catch phrase has increased or delayed the road projects in my area. With projects being delayed, my favorite running trails are rudely interrupted by a torn up road. The new pedestrian bridge that will link my new favorite running route is delayed even farther out. My ability to get the government to adopt my new health care reform package is put on hold until further notice. I have to take action.

The Solution: My new plan breaks through the excuses and creates a revenue generating process that will have friends and family talking about how crazy I am. I call it the "Adopt a Barrel" program. The concept is extremely simple, but the implications are endless. You now have the opportunity to own your little part of the road construction process by adoption a construction barrel.

Here's how it works: You log onto the adopt a barrel website. At the beginning of this new initiative, you will only be able to choose one option—adopt a barrel. You aren't really adopting the barrel to come home and live with you, but rather you get the honor of having your name printed on the barrel and then having it placed along the road for all to see.

Simply fill out the online form, write the name that you would like printed on the barrel, the number of barrels you would like to adopt and enter your credit card number. Once your barrel is put into service, you'll get an e-mail informing you where your barrel will be placed.

The proceeds from your purchase go into getting the road finished. After the project is complete you then will have the opportunity to purchase your barrel and have it shipped right to your door or for only pennies a day, you can buy a piece of asphalt. I can see this program expanding into offshoot programs; Adopt a Detour Sign, Adopt a School Crosswalk Sign, Adopt a Hazardous Waste Clean Up Site, the possibilities are endless.


  1. I'm afraid that if I adopted a barrel with my name on it, people would either swerve to hit it or would spray paint it.... and then everyone loses.